If last night?s Draft Lottery proves one thing, it?s that either God or NBA Commissioner David Stern has a delicious sense of irony.  And since Stern is Lord of the League, there?s not much functional difference between the two.

The lottery results are amusing because they give several teams precisely what they want ? high picks ? but little of what they truly need.

Orlando got the top spot they deserved for their wretched season.  A great opportunity to upgrade their team?s talent?  Maybe.  But what do they need?  In order, a center, a point guard, and then a complimentary swing player at either shooting guard or small forward.  What the team assuredly does not need is yet another power forward ? in Juwan Howard and Drew Gooden, they already have two.  The top two talents in this year?s draft?  Emeka Okafor and Dwight Howard ? both of whom are power forwards.

The Los Angeles Clippers moved up to claim the second pick.  Based on talent, they should select either Howard or Okafor.  But the strength of their team is power forward Elton Brand, who is already ably backed up by Chris Wilcox and Melvin Ely.  What the Clippers need more than anything else is a point guard.  Had they stayed at number five, they would have been in about the right spot to pick one.

It gets a little better for Chicago, which stayed at number three ? they could use a good small forward, and they?ll have their pick of some good ones.  What they really need, with Tyson Chandler?s iffy back and Eddy Curry?s iffy conditioning, is a solidifying force at power forward.  Okafor would be a perfect fit for this franchise, but there?s little chance of him being available at three.

The Wizards, with the third worst record this season, got their usual lotto kick in the groin.  No team has moved down as often as Washington.  This year, they dropped two spots because the expansion Charlotte Bobcats were pre-slotted at four.  The Wizards picking fifth virtually guarantees there will be four worthwhile players in this year?s draft.  Washington?s need position is small forward; the two best prospects at that position are likely to go at three and four.

It doesn?t get much better for Atlanta.  The Hawks covet homegrown high schooler Dwight Howard, but getting him will require a move to one of the top two spots.  They could use a point guard, but the best available are a skinny high school kid (Shaun Livingston), and Connecticut?s Ben Gordon, who played shooting guard last season.

For some, this would be evidence debunking the many conspiracy theories that have haunted the draft lottery since its inception.  I?m not ?some,? however.  Pro sports thrive on attention, and nothing stimulates offseason media coverage like rumors.

With teams arranged in draft positions that do not address their personnel needs, trade talks will increase exponentially, as will rumors.  That will boost fan interest, inflate league mentions on SportsCenter, and create a surge of message board conversation.

WizFans columnist James Rouse published an article (http://wizards.realgm.com/showarticle.php?artid=228) before the lottery suggesting that the results can be predicted by determining how the league will benefit most from the outcome.  In the absence of a compelling player who could transform a key market, the league benefits most from trade talks on steroids.  If it wasn?t arranged by Stern, he ought to be thanking Loki.

Kevin Broom is a Senior Writer with RealGM.com. He can be reached at KevinBroom@RealGM.com