We?re giving away New Year?s Resolutions this week, since I?ve never known an NBA player to make a change for the better without being court-mandated first.

Shaq:  Get in shape.  
Kobe: Stay out of court.  
Tony Allen. Stay out of court.  
Ruben Patterson: Stay out of court.  
Amare: Get on the court.  
Danny Fortson: Stay on the court.  
T-Mac: 2 words, corrective lenses.  
Duncan: cut that hair, dude.
Steve Nash: cut that hair, eh?  
Ben Wallace: fro it out.  
AI: quit passing to John Salmons.  
Ron  Artest: where?s that album, bro?

? What I learned this week:  Kenyon Martin is worse than he was in NJ but Carmelo Anthony is better than he was at Syracuse.  Sorry Kobe, your ?thug-life? forearm into Mike Miller?s throat doesn?t make you or the Lakers any tougher at Staples.  Be better than 6-8 at home and you?ll be tougher to play at home you twit. Toronto?s Mike James is just the kind of PG the Rockets could use.  Celtics, too.  Josh Smith might be the best shot blocker in the NBA not named AK-47.  In December he averaged 2.25 BPG.

? Bob Weiss, we hardly knew you.  The Sonics have fired their new head coach, who incidentally looked like the love child of Larry Brown and former University of Utah coach and China Buffet legend Rick Majerus.  After winning the Pacific last year at 60-22 Seattle has thus far limped into the New Year 12th in the Western Conference.  Meanwhile, the only two super Sonics, Rashard Lewis and Ray Allen, have publicly voiced their desire for Denver PG Easy Earl Watson. Where?s Nate McMillan when you need him?

? Worst team tracker finally got the match up it?s been waiting for: Raptors @ Hawks.  Toronto beat Atlanta 108-97 in the battle of the beatables.  Tough to tell who was worse.  Toronto?s #7 overall pick Charlie Villanueva managed just 2 points and 2 rebounds in 22 minutes.  They need to watch him b/c he?s slipping back into that no-effort mentality he carried with him for 3 years at UConn.  On the other side, Atlanta had double-digit scoring from 5 regulars and lost by 11.  Ultimately, the Hawks willingness to keep firing 3-pt shots (11 attempts) and near refusal to make them (2 were good) made it impossible for them to win.  Verdict:  even though they won, the Raptors are still the worst.  2-12 at home? Here?s hoping the Knicks overtake them.

? George Karl?s Denver Nuggets, though not as dominant at home as they were last year, are playing some exciting basketball.  Carmelo Anthony is improving game to game on offense (but didn?t he used to play D?) and they had been getting a career year from Marcus Camby before he went out with a broken pinky (and who saw that coming?).  But two guys who aren?t getting enough credit are Eduardo Najera and Earl ?the Squirrel? Boykins.  Najera is filling the void left by Nene?s injury and doing the little things that matter, grabbing O-Boards, loose balls and hustling on both ends.  Meanwhile Boykins has made Watson expendable and turned Andre Miller into a sometime shooting guard (scary, huh?) to make up for the strange case of Voshon Lenard.  These guys have a run in them, so pay attention.  Do yourself a favor, watch some Nags games and try to not fall in love with earl the Squirrel.  Unless they wear those Godless alternate uniforms.

? This just in: Michael Finley is making just $2.675 mil this year. From the Spurs.  Good thing Dallas is on the hook for $15.9 mil.  God, that has to hurt Cuban when Finley drops 15 in 20 minutes against them.  More on the ?Allan Houston Rule? fallout next week.

? Quote of the week: Sonics PF Danny Fortson on the suspension levied against him by the NBA and Stu Jackson:

?What Stu Jackson did is criminal, as far as I?m concerned.  It?s like a gangster, somebody just strong-arming somebody and taking their money. That is a gangster move. Gangster. That is gangsterism.?  
When Danny Fortson is making up words, that?s a good week for the musings.

? Trade of the week: A new segment to the weekly musings.  Each week between now and the trade deadline we?ll use RealGM.com?s patent-pending Trade Checker? to present to you a trade that is either being discussed or should be discussed.  Now, Ron Ron is too easy and frankly, we?re sick of him already, so we went in another direction.  Pending free-agent Peja Stojakovic has made it semi-known he has machinations on leaving the Capital City and signing elsewhere.  Rumors abound that Chicago is a preferred destination of Peja?s, as Chicago has one of the biggest Yugoslavian communities in America.  So we thought, why not do the deal now?  The Kings would love to dump Kenny Thomas too, and the Bulls? Michael Sweetney, once though untouchable by Isiah Thomas (ha ha) is in Coach Scott Skiles dog house.  Here?s the deal:

Chicago-Sacramento Trade Breakdown
To Sacramento

Tim Thomas
6-10 SF from Villanova
4.3 ppg, 1.3 rpg, 0.7 apg in 10.3 minutes

Andres Nocioni
6-7 SF from Argentina (Foreign)
11.4 ppg, 5.0 rpg, 1.2 apg in 27.0 minutes

Mike Sweetney
6-8 PF from Georgetown
11.1 ppg, 6.2 rpg, 1.0 apg in 22.6 minutes
To Chicago

Corliss Williamson
6-7 SF from Arkansas
3.9 ppg, 1.9 rpg, 0.3 apg in 10.2 minutes

Kenny Thomas
6-7 PF from New Mexico
6.7 ppg, 4.1 rpg, 1.4 apg in 18.6 minutes

Peja Stojakovic
6-10 SF from Yugoslavia
17.1 ppg, 4.6 rpg, 2.3 apg in 37.4 minutes

A Happy and healthy New year to everyone, even you Ron Artest.