WHEN I'M KING of the World...

The 11th Commandment will be: Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's coach...

I've got the chant when Larry Brown - he prevaricates only when his defense is moving - comes to town next season:

"Liar, liar, pants on fire." And next time the NBA's Jack Kerouac takes time off to smell his kids, I hope his kids don't smell him back. Reports from Auburn Hills, Mich., yesterday indicated that workers were busy re-arranging the office of Pistons GM Joe Dumars so his desk was backed against the wall. Is Joe a candidate for a machete between the shoulder blades, or what? The good news is that new Sixers president Billy King's groin received only a glancing blow from Larry's knee yesterday afternoon and he is resting comfortably.