Player leaves team with an excused absence for family reasons. Player stays away longer than team expected. Team expresses disappointment. Player reacts angrily and attempts to shame the team, defiantly pitting his family life against his professional life.

Sound familiar? It's Shaquille O'Neal's method of dealing with the tedium of the long regular season.

He pulled it in 1996 when his grandmother died and he left the Orlando Magic to attend her funeral in New Jersey. A week went by and nobody knew where he was until someone spotted him at a "club" in Atlanta. Then he made a grand entrance a few minutes before a Sunday NBC game, and lashed out at Magic management for being so insensitive as to wonder why he didn't at least call.

Shaq left the Lakers Tuesday for the birth of his baby girl. No problem. When he didn't show up again Wednesday, Coach Phil Jackson levied a small fine.

"That ---- knows what he can do with that fine," said Shaq, who took the opportunity to lash out at Jackson for other supposed slights. It seems the coach has been critical of the big guy's physical condition and (are you sitting for this?) his free throw shooting.

"If I was a knucklehead, I could see getting dogged out," Shaq complained to the California media. "But hey, I thought I did everything right, especially the last two years. But there's no loyalty in this league, none at all."